The Charra Edition!

My Little Sparks of Genius.
Little snippets of thoughts, that take the form of short verses. I'll keep updating as they hit me :)
Of-course, they get published, whenever I do a Spark Update.

And a graveyard you built, with stones and hearts of your loved
You buried the laughter, created pits for hands that reached out to you once
You patted the earth with satisfied emotions and smacked your mouth with glee
But you never entrapped me, you will never be truly over me.
As I surround your existence, your soul and your aura
You know now, what was to be buried, and what burned in you.
*
You smile, but still ask those questions that haunt me
I want you to smile, and let those questions fade away
I want you to know, a smile is all that it will take for me to break
Questions asked, numb expressions and clueless wanderings
Smiles, warmed and peaceful, nothing seen
You just need to smile, and that will keep me safe.
*
Contemplation, silence and the aura of this day.
Can it finally lead me to answers?
I pray to God, that it does.
But I feel a wall has been built.
*
Awaiting the winds, the smell to reach me
Take me away to a place, I wanted to be in
Haunting silences, and still breaths, garish faces
You came not with the winds, but with the storm
The storm that wiped me off my feet and took me
Took me to embrace life, unwillingly.
I wanted you. And I got life, the reality.
*
Will it rain again? Will you smile again?
Will you let your sad face light up again?
Will you drown your fears and let your words take you away?
Will you allow yourself to be swooped by the winds from the valley known as dreams?
Will you stop by the hillside, and look into the valley?
Will you? If you can't, you have lost again.
*
Let us know when you find peace
Let us know when you find order
Let us know when the skies are colder, and dark
Let us know when you find the reason to be again.
Let us know, for we are the flowers blooming
And the Sun shining.
*
Credulously misunderstood, unshaken beliefs in the lies
My harmed innocence, your stormy silence
Your way with words, and your gaze into those eyes
Eyes which seem to answer the questions
Questions that I don't want to ask
But I remain standing, for I always choose your silence
Your silence, over your lies.
*
Consumed apathy and peals of laughter
Like a world without your presence
Heals me.
Its still a world without your presence.
*
And I talk to myself, telling lies and betrayals that I see
I think about them, letting them take over me
I stop to smile, look at the faces just
And I forget the pain, embrace the smiles
Start anew
It comes back again.
*
I try to capture your eyes, and the tears in them
I try to see in your eyes my dreams
I will smile, as you smile looking ahead
And I will cry as you look away from me.
*
Like flowers swinging to the melodies of the wind
The wind that blows past my dreams, and desires
The people surrounding me stalk me like those flowers
A few of them strangle me
And some of them blow life and fragrance into me.
*
New avenues and harbors, immaculate opportunities
Destined to be a prodigy, a sign of admiration
Feeding off the recesses of the population
The ever-growing, hardened and strengthened Faith
Faith, never used to losing
Lost once. And the world stopped being.
*
So we glided upon the rusty hues of the skies
Blood-red and and the orange lining on the horizon
A new day, dawning and drawing me into a vortex
Into a belief in things not imagined, not seen
Not talked about but felt, quietly
As the morning grows old.
*
The scream, the mental agony, the momentary confusion
The inability to decipher, the inability to feel
The hands shaking, holding my head in denial
What happened in a flash
What words were said, do you remember now?
Will you ever remember after the bones are crushed
And the blood's run dry?
*
Because sometimes the water takes colours unseen
Sometimes it seeps into crevices unreachable
It trudges into paths untrodden
It fights forces that were hidden from all
It makes me wonder of it's beauty and might
And then I realize I am the stone in it's path.
*
Sitting idle, hearing voices that surround me
Music numbing the senses, a little soft voice crying
My ears acting as barriers to external thought
My eyes acting as filters to block out the light, of the actuality
My hands reaching out to the world, to keep the rain and your touch at bay
And my footsteps closing in towards you, to separate me from you.
I am not a part of this world, when I stop listening, hearing and feeling you.
*
I will be writing a million stories tonight
Weaving a thousand emotions into the net of conscience and belief
Harboring a streamlined look upon your faces, and I shall say words I feel
My mind has been freed from the gnarly hands of your existence
From the captures of your beauty and deception
I will write today, oh I will.
*
Standing right here, right in-front of you
Speaking words slowly, right the ones you want
The world's got issues, and the world's a part of you
The love that's yours, is mine, and you know
You know I am a part of the world, you know
And I stand in-front of you, trying to know you
Will the words, tell you of me? Only you know.
*
Its a new world, a new way, a new silence
Its built from flower petals, red, pink and violet
Its speaking of smiles, memories and desires
Its hoping and wishing a simple feeling, of bonds forming, of love evolving
Its a new feeling, stepping into the unknown
Its a good feeling, embracing the unknown
*
All I fail to do is thank you
All I want to do, is find ways and paths and stories to lose you
All I am doing is losing you
Winds blown, shut doors, scorching sunlight terminating
Too late, it might be.
Fear, overtakes me. Often.
Surrender? The ego shall triumph yet again.
*
Faces seen surrounded by fears
Halted visions heralded by the truth forced in the faces
So much hate. So much pain
So much enmity, you have no reasons
A happy surrender, would be enough
But you have no reasons.
*
The world's been a place where you and I have spoken in silence
The people have talked about life as if they own ours
The words that have been written here and there
Make me take a step back once you open your pages to me
The stories written in them, the marvels you achieve
And yet I stay quiet because the world sees me.
*
Throwing stones down the road
Feeling lost, seeing not the cars that pass me by
But empty places, and lightning flashes
Blinding the mind, the soul searches for a getaway
The stones thrown each break the heart into pieces
Each of them, the heart faces.
The soul is trapped, the heart embraces it.
*
Wait, for those moments of light
That when hits you, puts on a smile on your face
Wait, for these moments are strikingly beautiful
See the people and places bathed in the light
Don't cover your eyes, it won't blind you
It is meant for you, only you
Wait, and it will hit you, bringing that smile back.
*
When I'll reach for the stars
When I'll have a reason to smile
Winds swishing my glory far and wide
When I'll be my own story and words
Don't come asking then for a path, for a word, I won't
Let me see, in peace, let me achieve
When I'm done, let me be in peace.
*
Let's pretend to love, and share
Give in to the words spoken often
The warmth, joy and sweet volleys of words
Let's pretend we feel those
And live wondering what went wrong.
*
Given the flowering blooms
Oceans, dreams seen about them
I know you wonder about them
Wonder more intensely than me, when I experience
Its just that you fail to tell me
Its just that you fail to be you
Its just that the world scares you
*
There will be people still walking by
There will be numbers still building up
There will be winds and waterfalls falling down
There will be the sound of your body kissing the ground
And I shall see you, feel you, and haunt you
But it won't matter. Because there will be silence still pervading through
*
And then when I stopped feeling
And started pretending
Giving into the clenched fists and sealed lips
Seeing not your free spirit but the soul that does not exist
Clearly I am at fault, for how could I blame you for being who you are.
*
Because love was such an emotion
And peace was such a concept
So true, so apt, so lovely and so abstract
Because we lost all feeling and had regrets
Worry not, because the time has come to change
I feel you, and in me, you feel the changing winds.
*
And I never wanted to let you know
Know about the feelings and emotions
I never wanted to let you feel me
I did not want you to see me
But you defeat me
And surround me. I forgive you
You were meant to be me.
*
Sitting and surviving the winds blowing past
Burgeoning the feelings, emotions and drops of laughter
He sits alone on top of the hill
He watches the world die, in-front of his eyes
He wishes for death to rejoin his mates
But all he gets is sweet agony
Life, instead.
*
I wanted it to persist
I wanted things to slow down
I wanted a lot more
I wanted peace and the desire kept increasing
I know now, it won't
I know now, it can't.
*
Where the stars shine bright
And light crosses your eyes
Where you meet the love you want
Where you close your eyes wishing for dreams
Where life stops by to stare at you
You stare back, wishing for its end.
Wishing for life's end.
*
Angled and tilted, coloured and jaded
Subdued affirmations, silent struggles
You are the air I breathe, insanely
Sometimes understood, sometimes lonely
You are the explanation I needed.
Coloured, tilted and precious memory.
*
And then they said things
Feeling suffocated against their words
Shut in the oceans of silence
A passive startling silence
And then they said things
*
They say the roads to your destiny are there
They say hope will survive
They say your name will be remembered
What they don't say,
What they don't mean,
What they don't feel,
Do you, say, mean and feel?
I did. For myself.
*
I learned along the way to accept you as you were
I asked you along the way to break apart
I kept saying to you, that I need you
I kept smiling at you, because I wanted to
I have my hands on this one
I save my words for this last time
Maybe I am wrong, and maybe I say strong because I am
*
The time has slept past me
Like sand through the hands, closed shut
Closed tightly shut, letting nothing in
Gone is the glory, the words, the silence of your aura
What remains is death, and pain, and your whispered claims.
*
Some say its the seasons that change
Some say its the people who change
Some call the skies on ahead
I need to say this
I call myself up
And surrender the soul
Because it is me who is the change
*
And sailing on the seas ahead
I saw lightning striking on your face
I saw you then, and I slowed down
In earnestness I believe I know you
But when the starry night, and growling thunder showed me your face
I was scared
Very scared.
*
Forever enclosed in this mighty lie
In these walls of lies
In these shattering words
I need the way
You show me something
And I pause to pray
Let this be it.
*
All of this was so much more
All of this was the best...
I wish for feelings and I wish for success
But today, I wish for you
And you.
Stay happy, close…for you matter today.
*
In our hands there are sweet pearls and rubies
We fight for them everyday, so sweetly
The demons are around, and so are the angels
But I know you are around, the jewels will save me...
*
Yes, I did.
Yes there are shards of memories
But there are the little pieces of faith too
Little reminders of who we are
Small digressions of what we are
People with reason
People with voice.
*
Say the fire that is inside you is alive
Say that the words you say are yours
Say that you wish the world to be your place
Say it, and I shall believe
But with all you have done and said
I fail to hear you, and I fail to see you
You fail. And I fail in knowing you.
*
I don't get today
I am confused, verily I am
In silence, in motion I think
Think about the truth, and how distant it is
From my desires and thought
From my reality and wants
I want peace. The truth wants out.
*
The single hurl of the sweetness
Enchanting, seductive and scintillating beauty
Hushed aside!
This one's looking into the ground.
*
And I just want a nod
A simple word, for the flowers to bloom again
Its a sign, its a part of me
That when you stop looking,
You lose me.
*
The world is a strange place
It builds sugar-coated paths for you
Maple-syrup-ed and garishly sweet
Once you stick, you see black clouds taking over
You see hope breezed away into dark forests
You see yourself, in the mirror
Strange to you, strange to me.
*
Let me dream.
It’s my only respite right now.
*
Does that make me a failure? No.
*
Pieces of your silent smiles and grins
Inviting me to be my own glory
Hampered by the noise of the people around me
Stay still, stay awake
Don't be someone
Someone I don't want to know
And I want to hate.
*
The faces that I see
Ingrained little stories
Thousands of emotions that are coming through  
Waves of feelings searing through the air that surrounds me  
You keep me whole 
You keep me safe
You are the face that I want to see.
*
Stars, their silhouettes
The moon, its shadow. 
The paradoxes, 
The truth 
All hidden, all silent.
You are, the truth.
*
The searing pain
Aching insides
Little words that you say 
In my mind, when you don't at all 
In reality 
Hear me say them 
You are me.
*
These things take time
What I wanted, is simple
And confusing
Hidden from you, I keep it safe
I stare at you, where you embrace the presence
I am you, but you stay away...
*
The emotions today
Wanted to seize them all 
Its true 
I lost them, as I lost your sight 
I lost them, and I fight tonight...
*
And when it really does not matter,
You come along. 
You leave the silence 
And you leave the peace by me 
Alone.
*
Drowned in the seas
Awaken the beasts
Hide the senses
In demons, you believe
In hearts, you see
Broken and shards of peace
*
I was the leaf that moved to disturb the continuum.
*
Where you lay down your footsteps
Echoing sounds of despair in the shadows that surround us
You need only to tell me
I will be there
Without fearing you.
*
Its raining silently, the wind blows past my ears
I feel my thoughts being washed out
My wishes being seamlessly denied
If only you would make them happen.
*
Don't make that impression
Don't make me a fool
Don't make me oblivious of the fact, that I should still love you.
Yes. I should still love you.
*
Keep the silence to yourself
And tell me out loud.
What is it that haunts you?
And what is the reason you keep away?
From life.
*
Where the birds echoed the songs of joy,
We looked up, and found nothing...
*
In all these moments I tried to find a flower so rare
A beauty, a gem
Eyes would sparkle, keep me overjoyed.
So harshly I was pushed back into the dungeons
Cold, dark and true.
*
This long, it has taken me
This long, it has been a reason;
This time I will end it
Because the next time, I will fall.
*
Lets keep those secrets to ourselves
Lets forget who they really are
Lets make a beautiful world,
Filled with the desires and wishes they want,
And lets forget who we are...
*
You can't have fun everyday...
*
When I spoke to you, it felt eternal
When I listened to you, it felt beautiful
Then I betrayed you,
Then I left you,
Only to find that you were never there.
*
Is this a phase?
Or have we all become other selves?
*
Thinking all would stop and rest
Staying silenced for all that I wanted to do
I stopped before you.
To move forward.
*
Kuch baatein sochte sochte ye ehsaas hoa ke
Mar bhi jaaon yun to koi shikwa nahin...
*
Its your fault.
I am perfect.
*
Trying to pick up the pieces
The others left behind...
I stand still to look upon them, and smile
For they are so fake, so funny and so deathly.
*
What do you do, when you feel an emptiness inside?
A feeling that all is well, yet something is missing...
Not a 'feeling' perhaps, but you need to do something.
What do you do?
*
Above the mountain tops, what do you see?
I see the river,
And the ground beneath.
Never forgotten, always present.
The ground.
*
Words.
I became a human through them...
*
Free will, free thought, free feelings...
Do I know you?
Wish I did, but no...
Insane, yes, but true...
*
Kuch baatein yun kehni hain,
Leikin awaz mein bohut shaur hai...
Kuch baatein yun kehte kehte
Hum so gaye, bikhar gaye...
*
We kept falling and believing
But we kept evolving too...
Isn't that a good thing?
*
I crafted a piece
And I stand, waiting now to be seen...
*
Today I wait and wish...
Tomorrow, would you?
*
Confusion can be a little alarming, a little disturbing...when you overcome it - Peace.
*
New beginnings.
*
I am not interested, that is why I am lazy. Period.
*
And I remain silent knowing that someday...some day we will change.
*
I hate the stagnancy... I do.
*
And if the cause is known,
Why don't I know the answer?
*
Follow the light.
Into the dark...
*
And the sky is wild today...
*
Rammed into the state of silence
Forced through hardships,
I stand before you…
Untarnished...
*
Life is unpredictable.
*

Amna Siddiqui