Lapse in Time

On the eve of January the 31st, 2011, we took time lapse photos of the stars – finding their trails, looking up in the sky, wondering how much time would be ideal for a perfect shot. Time goes on, translating into a new year, a new way, a new curve in the cosmic reality that we behold in ourselves, hiding secrets, thinking about our ideals – really, time just goes on and on.

Do hazaar gyara. What a year.

Family, friends, things, obsessions, objectives, achievements, dejections, rejections, arrivals, moments, midnights, poetic ecstasy and so much more.

Just like the end of 2010 was a hallmark ending with my life taking a U-turn, turning me into something I had not known before, 2011 began with the same glory, the same me. It was the process of self-discovery, which I believe, reached its full high in 2011.

I lost some people, I gained some. I gained some very precious ones. I came unarmed into the arena for what was to come, unready, unassuming, unprepared. And it hit me, with forces that elevated me. They took me above, and high. At that point, that glory seemed like the only thing that mattered. The only thing that made me feel worthy of anything. I still take pride in those little moments lived in a day or two, because that was surreal. But I could not hold onto those ropes of assured success, simply because it was not in my hands. And my hands could not reach them; I just had to let them go. You get a taste of comforted vastness, and then it’s snatched away from you. Not because you were incompetent on anything, time and circumstances did not allow you to excel. And you look at your sorry state of affairs and wonder whether all of it was in vain. I look back and constantly remind myself: NO.

-those little moments of glory, I would forever cherish them

-I lost you, I think

-I gained a friend, and enemy, an enigma

-I bonded with previous ones

-a new life began

-the new life had its apprehensions and stories of success and denial, but its all good

-I realized what I truly was

-I gave way to more intellectual learning

-I tried to remain who I was

-I gave up on dejection, hope became central

-poetry defined me better than ever before

-this blog found its real home, my mind

-so much pain, and so much laughter

-Sparks

-this blog

-ourselves

-our egos

-our relationships

Ah, there is so much more to say.